Cold Cereal Anyone?

You know what's ALWAYS bothered me? Cold cereal mascots. I mean, that is just some FUCKED UP SHIT. The Trix Rabbit, for example, I dunno man... if I were him, I'd be fucking KILLING some kids. I remember a commercial where the fuckin' rabbit WENT INTO A FUCKIN' STORE AND BOUGHT A BOX OF TRIX WITH HIS OWN FUCKIN' MONEY. Fuckin' kids came outta NOWHERE and basically fuckin' mugged the poor stupid bitch rabbit. "Silly Rabbit, Trix are for kids!" Fuckin' rabbit just sat there and looked depressed. FUCK NO! That wouldn't fly with me! I'd have pimp-slapped EVERY ONE of those fuckin' bitches, made them get me the REST of a "complete breakfast," ate the Trix right in front of them, and THEN beat the shit out of them some more.

And what the fuck is with the disguises? All the dumb rabbit does is hide his ears and all of a sudden he's a fuckin' kid? I dunno about you, but if I SAW a six foot fuckin' RABBIT with his ears tucked under a baseball cap, I wouldn't immediately think, "Hey, there's a cool lookin' human kid, let me go over and share some of my cereal with him!" NO. I'd be thinking, "That's a six foot fuckin' RABBIT with his ears tucked under a baseball cap...what the FUCK was I just smoking?"

And another thing...what the fuck is up with cereal being "part of this complete breakfast?" Last time I checked, cereal WAS breakfast. They show a big ass bowl of frosted flakes next to a waffle, a pancake, toast, a banana, and a fuckin' grapefruit...who the FUCK eats a breakfast that big? Not me. I don't even EAT breakfast anymore. I mean, I eat when I get up, but the whole thought "BREAKFAST IS ONLY SERVED UNTIL SUCH AND SUCH TIME...?" Bitch, you make my fuckin' sausage and egg sandwich when I pay you the fuckin' money and don't give me that shit.

Back to stupid cereal mascots...

Lucky Charms. FUCKIN' LUCKY CHARMS!! Lucky can turn the fuckin' MOON into a marshmallow, and he can't escape a bunch of fuckin' six year olds?!?!? C'mon now, Lucky. I KNOW your bitch ass has got to have a "Blow the fuckin' kids up" spell SOMEWHERE or "make kids into marshmallows" and EAT those bitches. "They're after me Lucky Charms!"....KILL THEM, BITCH!

I dunno why I went off on this rant here...it's just always bothered me.